I wish she could talk to me about it, because I feel like I’m still owed a full explanation, but I get it. I miss talking to her.
Laura’s right, Arielle’s right, Mum’s right. I’m going to pick myself up today and get out and start getting my life together. I’m going to stop the shitposting as much as possible and do right by myself.
I can’t stop hating myself and feeling hollow all the time on command, and I’m not going to be okay, but I can pretend to be, hopefully for long enough that I can start believing it myself, and then maybe she will believe it too.
Get to the choppa by Austrian Death Machine may be the greatest song ever.